Wednesday 28 February 2007

Still hiding away

Usually at this time of year I go around the pubs I visited over Christmas and the New Year, to apologise for my behaviour. This year is different for several reasons. I have the excuse of a house move just before Christmas which as I explained to everyone who asked, was too much of a strain to allow me to enjoy the holiday, I was too exhausted to enjoy the partying and drinking.
In truth I am still trying to get over the deep embarrassment of my behaviour the year before.
I don't drink a lot, well not nowadays anyway, so when I do attend the end of year festivities I usually go overboard and behave in a foolish, childish way. Nothing bad really, I fall over, fart now and then, grin foolishly at everyone and annoy all and sundry by telling them that I think they are great people and I love them all and we must keep in touch. I'm one of those who doesn't get aggressive when drunk, quite the opposite, I love the world, even Phony Tony.
I usually go around the places in question, usually about this time to have a quiet drink and apologise to the landlord/landlady and anyone else who remembers my behaviour. Its all taken in good humour and I feel better for having done my penance and we all depart friends.
2005 Christmas was different, I'm still doing my penance and all because I let my tongue run away with me.

It seems, according to my long suffering partner that after drinking copious amounts of lager, Jack Daniels and Brandy, I became more than a little foolish.
It culminated in me asking EVERYONE, in a loud drunken slur. "Would you like to sit on my face?" Seems there were no takers, except for one guy who misheard what I said and tried to take me up on the offer, until my partner pointed out that I had actually said "SIT ON MY FACE". Silence, until I burst into a fit of giggles and promptly fell over and farted again.
I'm not a small guy, too big according to my doctor, so getting me back on my feet was a feat in itself.
The next morning after the fourth cup of tea I was told the story to which I had no recollection and as I listened appalled and embarrassed I realised it would take more than a simple apology to clean this one up, especially as I had really asked everyone, male and female.
I still haven't figured out just how to overcome the problem and when I bump into people that I know, I hold my breath waiting for some comment or other, which never happens as they are too decent to even mention it.
I know it will rear its head one day and until that time comes, I will continue as if nothing has happened, just what I'll do on that day of reckoning I'm not sure.

No comments: