Marriage Counseling

A husband and wife went in for counseling after 15 years of marriage.

When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 15 years they had been married. She went on and on about neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable -- an entire laundry list of unmet needs she'd endured over the course of their marriage.

Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and, asked her to stand, then embraced and kissed her passionately.
The woman, deeply moved, quietly sat down in a daze.

The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?"

The husband thought for a moment and replied, "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but I fish on Fridays."

Birds and Bees Chat

A little boy goes to his father and asks

"Daddy, how was I born?"

The father answers:

"Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway!
Your Mum and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo.
Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mum and we met at a cyber-cafe.
We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive.
As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared. that said:





You got Male!